How do I love ya? Lemme sum it up

Apologies to Elizabeth Barrett Browning


How do I love ya? Lemme sum it up
I love ya pretty much as far as my soul can reach,
If I had one, but I don't, so bad analogy there...
I love ya more than I love eatin' hamburgers an' fries,
An' I can tell ya, I really really love eatin' 'em!
Oh yeah, an' I love ya even when ya get all weepy and stuff
An' blame me for everything,
Which, when I think of it, is probably true,
But hey!  I'm a guy, what d'ya expect?
Yeah, I love ya even then.
And I also love ya when I'm feelin' low
'cause my TV is on the blink
And there's nothin' better to do but just talk with ya
About things ya like but that bore the hell outta me,
And stuff like that,
Yeah, even then I love ya.
And then, when I think how much I love ya and miss ya,
And I think, yeah, I could do this all my life,
Jus' lovin' ya an' lovin' ya
'Til, like they say, death do us part,
And then even after that, jus' keep on lovin' ya...
If I had a soul, that is,
Which I don't...so, I guess it's only until death, then...
Right.